Review: WWE Royal Rumble 2012

Brett Mix’s- “25th Anniversary of the WWE Royal Rumble 2012” Review:
  
 

 
 

 

“The Celtic Warrior is Going to Wrestlemania!”

 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 
 
-WWE Royal Rumble 2012 took place live on PPV Sunday Night, January 29th, 2012 in St Louis, Missouri.
-This was the 25th Rumble from the WWE.
-Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler and Booker T did commentary for the broadcast.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

-Now onto the PPV……………
 
 
 

 

 

 

1) Opening Contest- Daniel Bryan (C) vs The Big Show vs Mark Henry in a Triple Threat Steel Cage match for the World Heavyweight Championship

 

 
Daniel Bryan sure gets whipped in this contest for the first half. Lets be honest though, who wouldn’t expect that in a Cage match facing two giants.

Still paying his dues and yet World Champion? Something doesen’t add up about today’s WWE.

Big Show sling-shots Daniel to the side of the Cage as does Henry. Show places Bryan up high and he counters with a tornado ddt.

King says he hasn’t seen anything like that, yet 30 years ago him and Randy Savage put on the best Cage match of all time outside of Tully and Magnum from Starrcade 85.

Mark Henry scooped up Bryan and then got knocked out by Show. Show almost wins the title he covers Henry and then Bryan interupts it. Bryan triess to escape the Cage and then Big Show hangs onto the Champ as he has his body over.

Very Bret-Owen like here in this spot as Bryan climbs down but Show keeps him. Show holding Bryan in the air and then he drops down as he has survived the brutality.

I like the fact Daniel Bryan is still the Champion, I’m not sure he’s going to keep this title until Wrestlemania but hey, at least he retained. I’m always a fan of someone retaining the title when they first get it to make a credible reign. Unlike say any of Edge’s.

 
This opener was very short.

This wasn’t much to brag about.

At least to the point.

Show can’t believe he was so close. Daniel Bryan has an orgasm at the entrance stage.

Pretty underwhelming to be perfectly honest.

Now we get a long video package on John Cena and his loyalty to the WWE because we haven’t heard about this every week for the past decade.

 

 

 
**  
 

 

 

 
2) Alicia Foxx, Kelly Kelly, Tamina, and Eve vs Beth Phoenix, The Bella Twins and Natalya in an 8 woman tag match.

 

 
Natalya doin a lot of work early.

A thrown together tag match at the rumble?

Feels like 1998 again with the midgets.
Eve performs a BOOTY pop which they don’t stop talking about for a good minute but of course Lawler gets interested in this.

If he was half as interested in the WWE today as he is on the diva’s his commentary might get good again.

I find it hilarious Kelly is booed by the males in the audience once tagged in.

Kelly then with Diva Domino’s takes out all the diva’s fighting on the outside.

Kelly back in the ring gets a middle rope lariat, we could call it? Beth tags back in HARD and says get out of my ring.

Glam Slam does in Kelly and the heels win.

Not into ladie’s wrestling outside at the original Rumble when the Jumping Bomb Angels met the Glamour Girls, that was great and in 1988 to boot!

At least this stuff is kept some-what short.

 

 
* 1/4
 
 

 
3) John Cena vs Kane

 

 

 

We get the inevitable Zack Ryder video package shown a hundred times on every show and a terrible Johnny L and EVE Segment.

John Cena comes out to a thunderous roar of boo’s.

Michael Cole try and stir the pot saying he has more Facebook friends then The Rock.

Who cares?
Embrace the Hate Cena.

Even this new version of Kane gets a better ovation…

I wonder if these two, or one will be in the Rumble match. Back in years like 97 and 98 the single’s match wrestlers still appeared in the Rumble match.

Now however they have much more talent, but the star power is in this match.

Kane takes it to Cena for the first five minutes of the match and the crowd love it. They pop from Kane’s first uppercut on.

Kane controlling a match consists basically of just power moves and wear-down holds and now he slaps on a reverse chinlock.

Fans boo this of course because Cena is trying to will his way out.

If Cena dominates he will hear the boo’s and Cena ran right into a huge right from Kane.

If Kane somehow wins this match that will be one of the best things I have ever seen the WWE do to his character and this new and likely last push of his career.

However I just can’t SEE it happening due to Cena needing momentum going into Mania with The Rock which they are now claiming the biggest match in wrestling history.

It will never be bigger then…

 

Race-Flair
Hogan-Andre
Savage-Steamboat
Savage-Warrior
Steamboat-Flair
Tiger Mask-Dynamite
Rock-Hogan
Bret-Austin
Rock-Austin
Undertaker-Shawn

 

Rock-Cena will be big but not bigger then matches like those.
Cena comes in with a clothesline then runs into an uppercut.
Cena locked in an STFU and then Kane got out and turned it into a sidewalk slam.

A methodcal Kane goes to the top and hits a top rope clothesline.

John gets up goes for the You cant see me and Kane counters. Booker T is hilarious talking like it was all over and Super Cena can’t kick out of a simple move.

 

Cena Sucks and Lets go Cena are chanted, Kane tried to Superplex Kane off the top and he does his five knuckle shuffle from the top.

Because that will make the move so much better.

Cena charged at Kane and he falls to the ground.

Kane sees Cena has fallen to the outside and rams his back kidney-first to the ring apron.

Kane and John Cena brawl to the back and Cena takes some serious shots.
Kane now spots the dressing room door of Zack Ryder. Why didn’t Kane do this earlier in the show before the camera’s rolled.

Ahhhh the wonders of the WWE.

He just had to roll Zack in his wheel-chair during the match. Ryder is being pushed out to the entrance.

Zack is taken care of. Eve is in the ring. Cena comes out to try and save Eve from Kane. Kane chokeslams Cena and the fans love it as do I.

Kane’s music plays.
In the end it’s a double count-out close to the fifteen minute mark. Makes sense, keeps both looking strong and Kane as a monster.

 

 

This match wasn’t very bad at all. Pretty entertaining.

 

 

 

** 3/4
 

 

 

 

 
 
4) Brodus Clay vs Drew McIntyre

 
Since Drew McIntyre wasn`t in the Rumble he asked for a match to be on the card.

Fans really into Clay but Drew Mac clotheslines him.

Two matches un-announced for this event now taking place.

The Funk hits Drew and this over-hyped prospect in McIntyre is buried in under two minutes.

Cool.

Now he dances with his girls, he`s a mixture of Rikishi and Flash Funk.
Ahhhh a Slim Jim commercial…I miss Savage.

 

 
DUD

 

 

 
 

 

 
 
5) CM Punk (c) vs Dolph Ziggler (With Vickie Guerrero) for the WWE Championship (With Special Referee John Laurinaitus)

 

 

 

Dolph Ziggler no longer with his Perfection music comes out after No entrance theme for Mr. Laurinaitus which reminds me of McMahon circa 1998.
Punk gets a great pop as expected and is here to defend the WWE title.
Dolph Ziggler`s valet Vickie is kicked out by Johnny L which catches many off-guard.
Dolph Ziggler with some pretty good momentum to start.

We get chants of Lets Go Ziggler. Against such a fan favourite like Punk, that`s gotta mean big things for Ziggler. He is definitely going to be a future World Champion. Mark my words. Especially with who they give the gold to these days.

Punk comes back with chops and then Dolph Ziggler leaps up on Punk and he hooks a sleeper.

Punk counters with an Anaconda Vice and now a counter with a mat-based hold by Dolph Ziggler.

Punk is connecting with a ton of moves and it seems like they want to make this match rather short to as the Rumble is up-coming and they only have 87 minutes left of PPV time.

Punk went for the Go to Sleep, Dolph Ziggler countered then off the ropes Punk lands a high thrust kick but only a two count.

Booker things CM Punk should of double-hooked Dolph Ziggler after the punt to the head.

Punk then hit elbow DROP.

 
RANDY SAVAGE is chanted loud and clear, fans still wanting him in this year`s Hall Of Fame are letting their voices be heard.

 
CM Punk is this close to getting the three but Johnny L keeps missing it.

Ziggler countered and got a long two.

THAT was close. I don`t think Ziggler will win here but I belieed it for a moment there.

Punk caught a charging Ziggler, catapolted him nd not another go to sleep. Punk has the three counted for him by both officials. Johnny L trying to save his job because of tommorow night`s HHH judgment likely.

 
In the end Punk retains.

 
This match clearly the best of the night but still could have been more.

 

 
***
 

 

 

 

 
6) Main Event- The 2012 30 Man Royal Rumble Match

 

 

 

The entrants in the order they came out:

 

1) The Miz
2) Alex Riley
3) R-Truth
4) Cody Rhodes
5) Justin Gabriel
6) Primo
7) Mick Foley
8) Ricardo
9) Santino Marella
10) Epico
11) Kofi Kingston
12) Jerry the King Lawler
13) Ezekial Jackson
14) Jinder Mahal
15) The Great Khali
16) Hunico
17) Booker T
18) Dolph Ziggler
19) Jim Duggan
20) Michael Cole
21) Kharma
22) Sheamus
23) Road Dogg
24) Jey Uso
25) Jack Swagger
26) Wade Barrett
27) Otunga
28) Randy Orton
29) Chris Jericho
30) The Big Show

 

 

 
We`re back to 30 men for the Royal Rumble after last year having 40 for the first ever time when Alberto Del Rio won.
We know Miz is Number one after losing on Raw. Usually that means he will make the final four or he will stay in for a long duration and lose. That`s my prediction as Number one entrants always get this treatment. I think back to Flair, Backlund, even Hunter Hearst Helmsley in 1996.

 

The Miz comes out at 1. He cuts a promo saying he is awesome. Okay, original.

Who will be number 2 to get this thing going and headline WM 28 even though Rock-Cena will likely be their main event.

Number 2 is Alex Riley, his former student. These numbers are all drawn at random…wink, wink.

Here we go.

The Miz and Riley go at it to start and The Miz is almost tossed over the top but sticks a high boot into the face of Riley and then stomps on him in the corner. Miz chokes out Riley saying remember me KID. Alex Riley is eliminated. Miz says one man down, 28 to go.
Out at number three is R-Truth, I thought he`d be nuber two, so I was a number off. Truth comes in and charges at Miz and then a high heel kick. Booker sure puts over the colored guys a lot. Just saying, that`s the impression I get from his commentary. Miz and Truth former tag team partners. Only question here is, will Truth be gone before entrant number four. A suplex by Truth to Miz.

Four is Cody Rhodes the IC Champion. He`s really grown on me and now he stomps down on Truth. He holds him up for Miz to disect. Miz and Rhodes both team up on Truth. Rhodes hangs onto the apron. An inverted neck-breaker.

Already number five comes out and its Justin Grabriel. Rhodes and Gabriel exchanging chops. Miz and Truth battle in the other corner.

Primo entering at number six. Jobbers galore early on. And now Truth is thrown out of the ring and now he takes Miz out of the bottom of the rope and ddt`s him on the floor so he will be out of the way for awhile.

Lucky number seven is Mick Foley to a great pop. Lawler comments on how he`s getting a REAL POP not a cheap pop. Foley raised hell for a bit, Primo is gone.

Action kind of settles in the ring, Alberto Del Rio`s music hits but it`s not him. It`s Ricardo Rodriguez and hes getting Ricardo chants. Del Rio out with a groin injury. He drives a knee into Rhodes. From the Gabriel dropkicks Ricardo and now Mick and him work on him. Gabriel is gone.

Santino Marella is number nine and he holds the all time record for the shortest time in a Rumble Match at 1 second when Kane threw him out. Beat Warlord when Hogan threw him out in either 89 or 90. I believe t was 90. Santino with a couple of inverted atomic drops and now a series of roll-ups while Foley watches. Foley and Santino have a Cobra vs Socko fight while Miz is still in the match but injured on the floor. Socko goes into Epico.

Epico comes out and as I mentioned he was for about 10 seconds as Foley tosses him out. Four men currently in the ring, Foley, Rhodes, Miz who both came back in and then Santino eliminated by Rhodes. Foley now eliminated by Rhodes, fans boo. Down to Rhodes and Miz.

Entrant number 11 is Kofi Kingston who is getting a bit stale as a face but he joins two heels so he brightens the action inside the Rumble match a little bit. Kofi lasted 22 minutes last year and then a double axe-handle off the top rope. Rhodes with a high spinning heel kick to Kingston.
Jerry the King Lawler comes to the ring just like he did back in the day. King comes in and is held by Rhodes and Rhodes and Miz fail to level the boom and he dropkicks both guys. King drops the first and Cody again with another heel move, not only eliminating Foley, but the King.

Out at UNLUCKY or LUCKY 13 is Ezekial Jackson, oh look he`s Black and Booker is putting him over. Seriously, I`m not the slightest bit racist but the only time Booker puts a guy over is when he`s black it seems. Miz choked out. Almost at the half-way point of the Rumble. Finally they do what they used to in old-school Rumble matches and that is point out how guys at the beginning of the Rumble have been in for near 20 minutes and appreciate the duration. It seems like in 06 when Mysterio broke the record for instance they barely mentioned it at all.

Jinder Mahal comes out now and how many gimmicks have they had this gimmick. USA is chanted.

Khali comes out, he eliminates Mahal and Jackson. Kofi and Rhodes in the corner, Miz is being worked on by the Giant.

Sixteen is Hunico and everyone is brawling. Already the count-down goes.

Seventeen, Booker T comes to the ring for the second straight Rumble when he made his return last year when Striker MARKED Out. The second of the two announcers to enter. Kingston walks on his hands going in beast-mode to get away from Elimination.

Ziggler comes out because he did not win, and everyone is eligible. Ring is filling up now. I suspect Michael Cole will enter.

The Winner of the very first Rumble is 19, it`s Duggan. Booker is gone. COle is out.

What do ya know that Cole is number 20. Cole`s first I believe. I liked when The Coach was there.
Out now is the third woman to ever enter a rubble. Kharma making her big return and Booker loves it again. SERIOUSLY, enough, god. Ziggler told her to get out after Kharma throws out Cole. Kharma slams Ziggler and Vickie drops down. Hunico out. Ziggler throws out Kharma, vickie laughs.

So Chyna, Phoenix and Kharma are the three females to ever win a rumble. Three broadcasters have entered thus far. Out now is Sheamus working on Cody with a back-drop. Sheamus eliminates Kofi and now Rhodes who has been in for awhile. Sheamus pounds on the chest of Miz now still in it.

WOW. At 23 is THE ROAD DOGG! WOWWWWWW…marked out. Un-reaal. I never thought I`d see this. A pump-handle slam without the doggy style.
Jey Uso out and more carnage. Sheamus tries to throw out Ziggler now.

Jack Swagger joins at 25. Time is flying and it`s clear they want the Rumble full for the CLIMAX.

Now Wade Barrett comes out at 26 and only four men remain. New music it seems as well. Cole, Lawler, Booker talk about their times.

Otunga comes out. Three more men to come in. Miz still in.

Orton gets a giant pop in his home-town, the viper from St. Louis. Rhodes then attacks Orton, his former buddy. Orton double ddt as he clears house. Orton now with an RKO to Barrett and hes out.

The 29th entrant is Y2J Chris Jericho. Not sure if number 29 has ever won. Otunga is gone. He`s a 6 time World Champ, record-setting IC Champ, never has won the Rumble though. Miz over 43 minutes, Rhodes over 40. One more to go. Pretty big names left.

Big Show is the 30th entrant which dissapoint people wanting Taker`s return or a Lesnar come-back. He throws out Rhodes. The Final four. Miz is now out.
The final four is Sheamus, Orton, Big Show and Jericho. Orton the only one of the three to have won a Rumble match.

Jericho eliminates Orton and Big Show!

Sheamus and Jericho one on one. They have a stare-down. Staring at the Mania poster at all, it`s like I`m playing WWE 12 on X-Box.

We are guaranteed now a first time winner. Both men tie-up. Sheamus has Jericho almost out. Fans chant Y2J. It`s Ireland vs Canada.

Sheamus went for a big kick and Jericho slapped on the walls. Jerricho runs towards Sheamus but only one foot touches as it looks. This is quite long.

Jericho went for a code-breaker, Sheamus almost got him out and his feet have not hit the floor. Sheamus with a huge kick. Sheamus with a high boot to Y2J and Sheamus wins the Rumble.

 
In the end Sheamus eliminated Jericho to go to WM 28.

 

 

This Rumble match had its moments. Some clever booking so rivals could face off. Good performances by The Miz and Cody Rhodes. Kharma returning to be the third woman to enter a Rumble, and eliminating Cole. All 3 broadcasters entering and of course the Road Dogg Jesse James. Mick Foley`s role was good just wish it lasted longer. Everything else though, I didn`t like very much. The middle was rushed and the climax for lack of a better term sucked.

 

 

 

 

***
 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 
————————————————————————-
 
 

Final Rating for WWE Royal Rumble 2012 = 6/10
 

 

 
This show was pretty average which is unfortunate since this is usually my favourite show of the whole year. The Rumble had its moments, lets be honest, most of them do. The Climax was horrendous and long. I didn`t mind Kane-Cena, the burying of McIntyre, Punk`s title retain and surprise entrants like all the broadcasters and The Road Dogg. Other then that this show will not stand the test of time. I feel a rating of 6 is being generous.